Obviously don't make any commitments further in the relationship because you do not want to be married into an insane orthodox LDS family because it will cause alot of troubles. Is it wrong not to. I realize I rambled a bit and may not have answered all your questions; feel free to ask anything else you want to know. I'm sorry you may be hearing a lot of negativity from us.
You are brave and good people and seem to be raising wonderful children who will be lights for everyone with whom they come in contact.